Cycle 7
Understanding Anger
Am I Assertive or Aggressive?
C7 Session 52 - Am I Assertive or Aggressive?
Assertive – Confident and self-assured with expressing your needs without disrespecting or undermining others.
Aggressive – Ready or likely to attack or confront with an intimidating or condescending undertone when your needs are not met. Having a hostile nature.
Key Questions
WHO is a good example of a self-assured person in your life? What is their general mood?
WHAT should you do when there is something in the way of you getting your needs met?
WHERE should you focus your attention when dealing with any conflict?
WHY is it okay for two people to have very different outlooks about the same thing?
WHEN you feel rejected or like you are being overlooked what emotions are you likely to feel? Why?
HOW do you handle yourself when someone is intruding on your boundaries and knowingly disregarding your VESPM plan? Can others feel the same way?
Self-Reflection Points
It is important for you to know how to speak up for yourself, how else will you ever accomplish your goals?
Your aim should always be solution-based, not to win an argument.
Always have an objective and be clear about what you want. Take time to think. This will help you to be assertive.
Knowing when to back off or retreat shows wisdom on your part. If someone refuses to respect your VESPM health you must understand that you can't control others' behaviors, but you can control yours. Example; saying "Because I don't like that behavior I will .... When you ...." (you put them in control)
People's perception is their reality. Before reacting to another person's situation ask yourself, is this a situation or an emotional reaction? Don't get entangled in others' emotional roller coasters.
If you find yourself in a position where you don't feel safe speaking up for yourself, get help from a professional or a trusted friend. Move with discernment. Safety first.
Q - Has this session helped you to better understand and have better control over your emotions and reactions?
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